Mood: Pure Joy Happier than I've been in ages
Days Left Until Limited Wardrobe Tour Kicks Off:8
Days Until Kimeri's Birthday:27
Song of Choice:"Iris" by the Goo Goo Dolls
Topic: Lover's Try...This is more for Peter than anyone else I think because well me and him are kinda in this same limbo zone and he knows all the background and it kinda shows that sometimes when you think the ending of the story is all done and over sometimes the story is rewritten. Here's to Hope!
Entry Number 1 of the Day
An attempt is better than nothing isn't it? A flicker of ligh in the dark is better than none correct? Well with those questions running let me recount yesterday afternoon. about 12 I went over to Quita's to spend the night. about 12:15 we trotted over to the angels house. As we approached I tried not to look up because well you know maybe we'd just kinda get there and it would be like oh we're here not oh God there's his house...well it was the latter of course and he came out and the same reaction took place whenever we meet again. My face burned, my breathing was trembeling, lips went numb, stomach quivered, and my body shook, I felt cold and it was 90 degrees outside. Here I had been thinking that I'd never have that feeling again that I'd thought it out enough mentally that it would all be very professional and business like you know hello goodbye deal. That Idea was completely shattered when I saw the way he reacted to me. He looked down at the ground, a flash of color streaked across his face, he spoke quietly and his voice quivered. Quita skipped inside his house to get a drink and left us outside. The silence was long and he finally sat down and asked me to sit too not meeting my glaze. I told him I'd rather not. He began to speak. Saying apologize and being at a lose. He looked so helpless and confused I couldn't help myself. I kneeded next to him and held his hand I told him it was okay and that I wasn't angry with him so he should stop beating himself up over it. He said he couldn't that he deserved worse and more. His breath came in shudders and his chest shook. After a few moments we decided to go inside. Quita was on the sofa watching Gone in 60 seconds and he went upstairs. I sat with Quita for a while 10, 15 minutes and he hadn't come down so I went up to find him. I found him in his room sitting on his bed staring at his hands. A note was in his hands four pages and he gave it to me. I put in my pocket to read later. I sat next to him and held him. Then he began to talk and said he had this whole speech planed out and how now he couldn't remember it. We sat in silence for a while then he pulled away from me and layed down covering his face with his hands. I layed down next to him with my head on his chest listening to his heart and his breathing. The sound was slowly lulling me to sleep. When we started to talk. He said that he'd missed me and that he'd wanted to hold me like this for ages. Tears slid down my face and onto his skin. He told me that he found a note he had written me in the 8th grade telling me he had a crush on me and that he never got the nerve to give me and I laughted and told him I wished he had. Eventually the phone rang and shattered the peace and silent appreciantion of one another's company. Soon we joined Quita on the couch watching Moulin Rouge. In one point Quita went up the stairs after telling me we had to spend the afternoon with a person whose company I do not like. With over melodrama I fall on my back in a Why me way and just layed there.He hovered over me and offered me his hands to help me up. I took his hands but instead of rising I pulled him down to me. What follwed was a brief kiss and holding him and feeling his heart near mine. We rose and little later Quita came down and we watched some Moulin Rouge.Then door bell rang and well me and Quita ran upstairs and hide in the closet(reason is that the person whose company I do not enjoy lives two doors down and she was probably looking for us so he said come in and look she wouldn't find us ^-^) Well soon after she left He came upsairs and we all started wrseteling on the bed, smacking each other with pillow and just acting like kitten brothers and sisters. Later we decided to leave to met the girl I don't like. Quita started down the stairs and I followed but he grabbed me around the waiste and pulled me back to him. We hugged and just as I started down the stairs again he pulled me back and initiated a kiss. I pulled away after a moment telling him I had to go. He looked down and said he knew and so we left. The experience was a pleasant one.One I'll never forget and hopefully is a prelude to many more. Later that night I read his letter. He told me he was sorry that he hadn't tried harder but that I could have tried harder with my parents and explaining his girlfriend bouncing and such and well it was a very good letter to me. In anycase that was my day yesterday-or at least the important part. Quita later that night gave me one of his sweaters that she had stolen from his house one day when it was cold and told me I could keep it. The sweater is much like my brown one only in Pita green with a pouch in front and a hood that makes me look like Ayumi from Fly High. Also the sleeves have holes because they are so long. She also told me that was teh happiest she'd seen him in a long time and that he is a different person around me. Which makes me wondera bout so many things...
Peter I guess what I'm saying is sometimes you plan it out in your head and well it doesn't go that way and well you know a little hope sometimes pays off you know.
Days Left Until Limited Wardrobe Tour Kicks Off:8
Days Until Kimeri's Birthday:27
Song of Choice:"Iris" by the Goo Goo Dolls
Topic: Lover's Try...This is more for Peter than anyone else I think because well me and him are kinda in this same limbo zone and he knows all the background and it kinda shows that sometimes when you think the ending of the story is all done and over sometimes the story is rewritten. Here's to Hope!
Entry Number 1 of the Day
An attempt is better than nothing isn't it? A flicker of ligh in the dark is better than none correct? Well with those questions running let me recount yesterday afternoon. about 12 I went over to Quita's to spend the night. about 12:15 we trotted over to the angels house. As we approached I tried not to look up because well you know maybe we'd just kinda get there and it would be like oh we're here not oh God there's his house...well it was the latter of course and he came out and the same reaction took place whenever we meet again. My face burned, my breathing was trembeling, lips went numb, stomach quivered, and my body shook, I felt cold and it was 90 degrees outside. Here I had been thinking that I'd never have that feeling again that I'd thought it out enough mentally that it would all be very professional and business like you know hello goodbye deal. That Idea was completely shattered when I saw the way he reacted to me. He looked down at the ground, a flash of color streaked across his face, he spoke quietly and his voice quivered. Quita skipped inside his house to get a drink and left us outside. The silence was long and he finally sat down and asked me to sit too not meeting my glaze. I told him I'd rather not. He began to speak. Saying apologize and being at a lose. He looked so helpless and confused I couldn't help myself. I kneeded next to him and held his hand I told him it was okay and that I wasn't angry with him so he should stop beating himself up over it. He said he couldn't that he deserved worse and more. His breath came in shudders and his chest shook. After a few moments we decided to go inside. Quita was on the sofa watching Gone in 60 seconds and he went upstairs. I sat with Quita for a while 10, 15 minutes and he hadn't come down so I went up to find him. I found him in his room sitting on his bed staring at his hands. A note was in his hands four pages and he gave it to me. I put in my pocket to read later. I sat next to him and held him. Then he began to talk and said he had this whole speech planed out and how now he couldn't remember it. We sat in silence for a while then he pulled away from me and layed down covering his face with his hands. I layed down next to him with my head on his chest listening to his heart and his breathing. The sound was slowly lulling me to sleep. When we started to talk. He said that he'd missed me and that he'd wanted to hold me like this for ages. Tears slid down my face and onto his skin. He told me that he found a note he had written me in the 8th grade telling me he had a crush on me and that he never got the nerve to give me and I laughted and told him I wished he had. Eventually the phone rang and shattered the peace and silent appreciantion of one another's company. Soon we joined Quita on the couch watching Moulin Rouge. In one point Quita went up the stairs after telling me we had to spend the afternoon with a person whose company I do not like. With over melodrama I fall on my back in a Why me way and just layed there.He hovered over me and offered me his hands to help me up. I took his hands but instead of rising I pulled him down to me. What follwed was a brief kiss and holding him and feeling his heart near mine. We rose and little later Quita came down and we watched some Moulin Rouge.Then door bell rang and well me and Quita ran upstairs and hide in the closet(reason is that the person whose company I do not enjoy lives two doors down and she was probably looking for us so he said come in and look she wouldn't find us ^-^) Well soon after she left He came upsairs and we all started wrseteling on the bed, smacking each other with pillow and just acting like kitten brothers and sisters. Later we decided to leave to met the girl I don't like. Quita started down the stairs and I followed but he grabbed me around the waiste and pulled me back to him. We hugged and just as I started down the stairs again he pulled me back and initiated a kiss. I pulled away after a moment telling him I had to go. He looked down and said he knew and so we left. The experience was a pleasant one.One I'll never forget and hopefully is a prelude to many more. Later that night I read his letter. He told me he was sorry that he hadn't tried harder but that I could have tried harder with my parents and explaining his girlfriend bouncing and such and well it was a very good letter to me. In anycase that was my day yesterday-or at least the important part. Quita later that night gave me one of his sweaters that she had stolen from his house one day when it was cold and told me I could keep it. The sweater is much like my brown one only in Pita green with a pouch in front and a hood that makes me look like Ayumi from Fly High. Also the sleeves have holes because they are so long. She also told me that was teh happiest she'd seen him in a long time and that he is a different person around me. Which makes me wondera bout so many things...
Peter I guess what I'm saying is sometimes you plan it out in your head and well it doesn't go that way and well you know a little hope sometimes pays off you know.
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home